Hey guys, I’ve upgraded! According to the folks at r/dionysus I am no longer a Nazi but a Zionist now.

Which is really weird because I generally don’t talk politics outside of history, and have certainly never discussed how any piece of land inherently belongs to any population (except the territory which Anglos call Alberta, Montana and Wyoming which did, does, and shall always belong to the Blackfoot Confederacy! Technically our empire extended down into New Mexico but I’m not partial to the in-between states so y’all can go ahead and keep them.)

It’s weird that they’ve somehow inferred my Zionism from the fact that I’ve been discussing the polytheistic religions of the ancient Kingdoms of Israel and Judah, and venerate many of the divinities once revered there and throughout the Levant, but I’m not bothered by the apparent accusation. I don’t believe that border disputes should be settled by divine fiat; on the contrary I am of the opinion that might makes right, and the Jews have always been formidable fighters, from their utter devastation of the Amalakites to their defeat of Egypt, Syria, Jordan, Iraq, Lebanon and assorted other Arab states in the Six Days War. This is why there deserves to be a modern state of Israel (nor do I believe that they should have given up the territory won during that epic confrontation, any more than the Blackfeet should have stopped fighting the French and Americans, or signed the humiliating treaties they were presented with; but since I am not now nor have I ever been a member of the Knesset — or a Blackfoot Chief — that’s not really my call to make. I am content to stay out of politics entirely — I’m not even registered to vote — and instead focus on serving Dionysos as an Orpheotelest.)

The Nationalsozialistische Deutsche Arbeiterpartei, on the other hand, despite claiming to have founded a Thousand Year Reich, saw their polity collapse within a dozen years, and — as if that wasn’t shameful enough — were largely brought down by a bunch of rag-tag Commies led by a semi-literate, inept horse-thief from the Caucasus. There are a bunch of reasons why I have resented being lumped in with such ilk (mostly by a group moderated by a buffoon who hasn’t had an idea he hasn’t plagiarized from me for almost as long as the Third Reich lasted, a pedophile from Australia, and a former teenaged demonolator, no less) but after their socialism, their leader being a syphilitic meth addict, and a couple others I could name, the fact that the NSDAP were such losers has always severely chafed me. Sorry, but I like winners.

So, while confused, I am pleased that they have now taken to calling me a Zionist and will continue to cheer on the IDF as they trounce Hezbollah, Hamas, the Houthis, the Islamic Republic of Iran, their proxies and allies, and anyone else who threatens Jews around the globe. And may Yahweh Sabaōth and Dionysos Abraō continue to bless their efforts and grant them victory.

And may those dumb enough to make themselves foes of a Blackfoot find diversions other than harassing me (like figuring out their genders) or so help me I will publish the dirt I have on you disgusting antisemites. And that will just be my opening salvo.

Now back to writing prayers for Dionysos.