Which of these stories do you think would make the best subject matter for a play?
“In the court of the Ptolemy who was called Dionysos there was once a man who accused Demetrios, the Platonic philosopher, of drinking nothing but water and of being the only person who did not wear women’s clothes at the Dionysia. He was summoned next morning, and had to drink in public, dress up in gauze, clash and dance to the cymbals, or he would have been put to death for disapproving the king’s life, and setting up for a critic of his luxurious ways.” – Lucian, On Slander 16
“Proitos had daughters (Lysippe, Iphinoe, and Iphianassa) by Stheneboea. When these damsels were grown up, they went mad, according to Hesiod, because they would not accept the rites of Dionysos, but according to Akusilaos, because they disparaged the wooden image of Hera. In their madness they roamed over the whole Argive land, and afterwards, passing through Arcadia and the Peloponnese, they ran through the desert in the most disorderly fashion. But Melampos, son of Amythaon by Idomene, daughter of Abas, being a seer and the first to devise the cure by means of drugs and purifications, promised to cure the maidens if he should receive the third part of the sovereignty. When Proitos refused to pay so high a fee for the cure, the maidens raved more than ever, and besides that, the other women raved with them; for they also abandoned their houses, destroyed their own children, and flocked to the desert. Not until the evil had reached a very high pitch did Proitos consent to pay the stipulated fee, and Melampos promised to effect a cure whenever his brother Bias should receive just so much land as himself. Fearing that, if the cure were delayed, yet more would be demanded of him, Proitos agreed to let the physician proceed on these terms. So Melampos, taking with him the most stalwart of the young men, chased the women in a bevy from the mountains to Sicyon with shouts and a sort of frenzied dance. In the pursuit Iphinoe, the eldest of the daughters, expired; but the others were lucky enough to be purified and so to recover their wits. Proitos gave them in marriage to Melampos and Bias, and afterwards begat a son, Megapenthes.” – Apollodoros, Bibliotheka 2.2-3.1
“When the Bacchanalian revels were being celebrated at Rome, Aruntius, who had been from birth a water-drinker, set at naught the power of the god. But Liber cast a fit of drunkenness upon him, and he violated his daughter Medullina. But she recognized from a ring his relationship and devised a plan wiser than her years; making her father drunk, and crowning him with garlands, she led him to the altar of Divine Lightning, and there, dissolved in tears, she slew the man who had plotted against her virginity. So Aristeides in the third book of his Italian History.” – Plutarch, Greek and Roman Parallel Stories 19
“When he was pursued by Lykourgos and took refuge in the sea, Thetis gave Dionysos a kindly welcome and he gave her the golden urn, handiwork of Hephaistos. She gave it to her son Achilles so that when he died his bones might be put in it. The story is told by Stesichoros.” – Scholiast on Iliad 6.135
“According to Eratosthenes, another story is told about the Asses. After Jupiter had declared war on the giants, he summoned all the gods to combat them, and Father Liber, Volcanus, the satyrs, and the silens came riding on asses. Since they were not far from the enemy, the asses were terrified, and individually let out a braying such as the giants had never heard. At the noise the enemy took hastily to flight, and thus were defeated.” – Hyginus, Astronomica 2.23
Vote in the comments. I’ll close the ballot when we have a clear majority.