An explanation

I have been making all of these posts for a reason.

You see, I have a very archaic mindset. I can use technology, but I don’t even begin to understand how or why it works. I adamantly believe that bloodletting will cure all diseases by properly aligning the humours. (I happen to suffer from an excess of melancholic bile, or so says my physick.) My mistrust of heliocentrism — clearly one may observe overhead the transit of fiery Phaethon! My frequent attendance at chair-rattling séances. My exceptional fashion sense.

I just wasn’t made for this vulgar age.

And that is why I am frightened to travel. How, by Christ’s wounds, is that giant metal beast ever going to ascend to the heavens or stay aloft once it gets there? It is beyond comprehending!

And yet they say it happens all the time without incident.

But they say a lot of things.

So I have prepared. Should I not make it back from my Ulyssean wanderings I want my final blog posts to have been in praise of them I hold closest to my heart, my crew of motley gods and spirits — and most especially Dionysos. And Hermes! One mustn’t forget Hermes! Or Spider. Or all the rest.

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , | 17 Comments

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17 thoughts on “An explanation

  1. I consider flying to be a gift to be in the realm of Zeus, and always thank Him for that honor as well as asking for protection.

  2. It’s tiny, winged horses that keep the plane aloft. They’re just invisible, that’s all.

  3. I don’t like planes. Hearing them overhead makes me think the sky is falling and being planes is always unsettling. Bah. Blessings.

  4. I have always been terrified of heights, and therefore of airplanes; it seems so unnatural to travel so quickly, to fly higher than the birds, and to so pollute the environment with jet fuel. I always travel with a talisman, and prayers and protective charms, following several sleepless nights worrying about the coming adventure. Nonetheless, the most trouble I’ve ever encountered (though disturbing) was a random pat-down search as a child, and the most my love has endured, after over a hundred flights on business trips, was a four-hour wait on the tarmac. With Hermes by your side I am sure your journey will be swift and safe.

  5. I look out the window and picture Thor in his goat-drawn chariot, with Loki hanging off the back bumper.

  6. I remember my first time on a plane.
    It was beautiful, going up above the clouds, looking down and seeing the Floridian coast, or water at least. I know I saw water at the very least.
    I remember being very nervous and thinking “At least if I die, it’ll be on the news.”

  7. Surely you are familiar with Hephaistos’ other works, including Bubo, the owl that is metal and can fly? Same thing, only larger, dear friend. Consult Aristotle’s popular series, Technologica, or How Things Work for further information!

    But, in all seriousness, safe and blessed travels, my friend, and be borne on the wings of Hermes swiftly to and from your intended destinations.

    • It saddens me deeply that Bubo isn’t actually part of Greek mythology. Granted, there’s Hephaistos’ animate manikins — but they’re not clockwork owls.

      • You’re the Pagan Pope. Surely His Phallic Awesomeness Pope Sannion I can declare Bubo to be part of Greek mythology. After all, new elements were added all the time originally, weren’t they?

        As for flying, I absolutely love it. I love everything about it–I love airports, being in an airplane for hours going off to some new location (hey, if I wasn’t crazy, would I be hanging around here? ;P )

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